tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7883575918962696728.post5406708664153891477..comments2023-10-16T04:59:19.394-07:00Comments on Doll-lightful: Nora Breaks Her Silence (Photo Story)Jewellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16210320389634837355noreply@blogger.comBlogger14125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7883575918962696728.post-73555529730494466542016-07-03T17:52:48.425-07:002016-07-03T17:52:48.425-07:00Yep, it was definitely a good idea to open up to s...Yep, it was definitely a good idea to open up to some trusted friends. She'll need someone to give her support and encouragement as she does the same for her husband while he works through his addiction.Jewellhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16210320389634837355noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7883575918962696728.post-24240758825622969982016-07-02T20:22:03.170-07:002016-07-02T20:22:03.170-07:00Hmmm, interesting issue to deal with. If he enjoy ...Hmmm, interesting issue to deal with. If he enjoy to much she needs to inquiry about it but if he addicted that a serious issue in itself. Good thing she decided to open up with the ladies she trust. Brinihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07258826511023083051noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7883575918962696728.post-86034390911921063412016-07-02T12:42:15.740-07:002016-07-02T12:42:15.740-07:00Good point that a distinction should be made betwe...Good point that a distinction should be made between enjoying porn and an addiction to porn. I think what supports Nora's claim of addiction here is the fact that Kirk feels the need to do this in secret and he lies about it. When confronted (which she said she's done more than once) he says he'll stop but then can't or won't. I'd also point out that she didn't say they *never* have sex anymore. She made it sound infrequent. Men with porn addictions tend to spend so much time pleasuring themselves that they have little energy or interest in being intimate with a partner. She wasn't overly graphic about what went on in their bedroom during those months they weren't having sex, so I can only hope they found other mutually satisfying ways to meet their needs for intimacy. And while I understand your stance on letting him enjoy a bit of porn, there's something else to consider. Nora referred to Jamal as one of their pastors, so I can assume they are at least semi-regular church goers. I don't know of too many church communities that would view his behavior (lusting after other women) as acceptable for a married man. Many churches are quick to point out that the act of lust for anyone other than one's spouse is tantamount to adultery.Jewellhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16210320389634837355noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7883575918962696728.post-91464467349166159542016-07-02T11:34:11.375-07:002016-07-02T11:34:11.375-07:00Such a sticky situation. No pun intended. Is he r...Such a sticky situation. No pun intended. Is he really addicted? Just because a person watches porn doesn't mean they are addicted. I'm not sure she's qualified to know the difference. It's not like she says she has caught him on many occasions. She's only seen it in the search history. Now if he's addicted, then that's a problem. If he's not addicted but he's self serving because he's not getting any from his wife, then I don't see the problem. Why do women assume the women in the videos are in better shape than they are? I would venture to say, majority of them are not. Men aren't looking at those women thinking I would love to be with her based on what she looks like. <br /><br />Research says that the average man thinks about sex minimum 34 times every day! I can't even imagine. That's over 4000 times during the 4 months she isn't having sex with him. Was she doing other things to satisfy her husband during that time? If not, stop being so selfish and let the man at least have a little porn now and again. We women need to understand men are not built like us. Some of us can go years without even thinking about having sex. We expect our men should be able to do the same thing. That is not a reasonable request. Nora should have an adult conversation with her husband about the issue, without the tears and without her self-pity. If she is able to understand why he is doing what he is doing, they can address the issue as a couple. Again, if he's addicted. Different problem and he will need to seek help.Vanessahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09027064808344974667noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7883575918962696728.post-47119015913903788512016-07-01T21:12:29.857-07:002016-07-01T21:12:29.857-07:00It's definitely a tough position to be in. Eve...It's definitely a tough position to be in. Every kind of addiction affects the addict's loved ones, but this one more than any other feels like an attack on the innocent spouse. When my friend went through this, I remember wanting to tell her husband what a selfish bastard I thought he was to put her through so much emotional pain so he could jack off to sleazy pictures and whatnot. All she could do was cycle back and forth between angry and depressed. I imagine I would do a lot of cursing and then I'd put his a$$ on blast (to the pastor) if it were me. I wouldn't know what else to do.Jewellhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16210320389634837355noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7883575918962696728.post-76188907652078126132016-07-01T21:00:05.864-07:002016-07-01T21:00:05.864-07:00Thanks, grandmommy. It's so nice to see a comm...Thanks, grandmommy. It's so nice to see a comment from you. You've been missed. I agree that it's nice to see sisters supporting one another. And those babies are too stinkin' cute!Jewellhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16210320389634837355noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7883575918962696728.post-52039235777279820812016-07-01T20:51:56.954-07:002016-07-01T20:51:56.954-07:00For now it seems that all he's doing is "...For now it seems that all he's doing is "self-serving" off of what he sees when he looks at the websites. The trouble is that can lead to more risky behavior if it doesn't stop. Like any other type of addict, Kirk can't control his urges. He is dependent on pornography in the same way a crackhead is dependent on cocaine. Kirk and Nora can get through this, but only if he's willing to seek help.Jewellhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16210320389634837355noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7883575918962696728.post-13905385988556339272016-07-01T20:27:13.669-07:002016-07-01T20:27:13.669-07:00Yes, this sort of thing has become more and more c...Yes, this sort of thing has become more and more common. That's why I decided to write about it. A good friend of mine struggled through the pain of having a spouse with an addiction to pornography. A support system was/is key. Thankfully, her husband got help before it led to other infidelities. Jewellhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16210320389634837355noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7883575918962696728.post-36323248029514146902016-07-01T20:13:22.020-07:002016-07-01T20:13:22.020-07:00Wow, I have no clue what I would do in this situat...Wow, I have no clue what I would do in this situation. My first reaction would be, "Dump that fool!" Then next I would think, "I cant take care of this baby by myself!" Then I would probably curse a lot and stew and stare at him when he wasn't looking. Dang, what a tough position to be in.<br />Muffhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06121187068323359131noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7883575918962696728.post-88867398067414693982016-07-01T19:50:44.534-07:002016-07-01T19:50:44.534-07:00Thanks, Georgia Girl. A support system like this i...Thanks, Georgia Girl. A support system like this is so important. A college friend of mine was the inspiration for this story. Her husband developed a porn addiction after the birth of their first child. She wasn't sure their marriage would survive it, but I'm happy to say it did.Jewellhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16210320389634837355noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7883575918962696728.post-5743814777041859312016-07-01T19:24:35.289-07:002016-07-01T19:24:35.289-07:00Funny, while reading this in my head it was in hus...Funny, while reading this in my head it was in hush calming tones. Very nice to have the support of her sisters on everything from family planning to marital concerns. VERY NICE! Cute babies too!The grandmommyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13174644267350343828noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7883575918962696728.post-45853260952267352252016-07-01T13:43:50.330-07:002016-07-01T13:43:50.330-07:00Poor Nora. I hope she and Kirk can work it out. ...Poor Nora. I hope she and Kirk can work it out. You have to wonder if he's only looking at women. I would think looking and not getting it elsewhere would push him to want to do something with his wife. Jaye's Doll Spacehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13409132062845348610noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7883575918962696728.post-2232504969221679222016-07-01T06:31:28.591-07:002016-07-01T06:31:28.591-07:00Very interesting story, Jewell. This kind of thing...Very interesting story, Jewell. This kind of thing goes on more that people think it does. I hope JJ and Nora both get some counselling. Porn can lead to other types of infidelities. Look what happened with Josh Duggar! It is good that Nora has the support of her friends. She will need help to get through this.Phyllishttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06084954419650988542noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7883575918962696728.post-50698369668733871742016-06-30T21:10:04.282-07:002016-06-30T21:10:04.282-07:00Awesome photostory Jewell!! There is nothing like...Awesome photostory Jewell!! There is nothing like girlfriend-sisterly love. I am happy that Nora was able to let it out. I had a relative who had a spouse that was addicted to porn. It can destroy a marriage. Hopefully Kirk will allow the pastor to counsel them. Great read and I thoroughly enjoyed it! By the way, Monica's home is nice!Georgia Girlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12161464262175993611noreply@blogger.com